Occasionally I have trolled Craigslist for a treadmill. I mean one can’t have to many running options. I figured if the right thing came along then it was meant to be. There have been numerous times I have had to skip a run because of life. I know, YOU get it! And I know YOU get the same insane, I want to kill someone feeling if your scheduled run doesn’t happen. Blame everyone and pout like a spoiled brat. It’s so endearing for your spouse to watch.
Last week I found this treadmill about 15 minutes away from us which is a miracle itself because we live in the Middle of Nowhere. It was listed for $500 bucks but I figured, “Ah what the hell I’ll just call, poke around with a few questions.”
Phone rings and some out of breath, woman answers in a raspy voice, “Hello”

Me-Hi I’m calling about your treadmill for sale?
She- ummm (I think she is struggling to remember what a treadmill is) oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah! We stillz got it.
Me-Oh. Ok. Ummm how old is it?
She-oh lord. My huzband just bought it a few months ago at Sears when they were closin. We never used it. I’m getting double knee surgery and hiz back is all messed up. I don’t why he bought the dam thing! It was $800 and I guess he was tryin to be nice and get us all healthy. as she lets out the most heinous smokers cough ever
Me- um ok. Well how many miles have you put on it?
She- none. I think we turned it on a few times we ain’t never used the thing.
Me-ummm ok. Well have a lot people have called you?
She-not too many honey (I HATE when people call me honey btw). One gal almost bought it but she chose another one.
Me- well maybe I’ll come look at it?
She-sure honey.

So now I’ve become obsessed with going to look at this treadmill that I don’t really need. Furthermore I have ZERO intention of spending 500$. But I just can’t help myself and I’ve got to look at it and it’s so close by.

My mother in law and I drive to the sketchy part of town, we pull up to the house that has 2 cars, a hot tub in the front yard and a yapping chihuahua circling so we park our rig.

Out comes the husband. Whoa. What a train wreck is all I can say. Now forgive me if I’m discribing any of your long lost cousins but lets be honest. Homeboys teeth are rotted out, a ciggerette is hanging out of his mouth. After every other sentence he is yanking up his dirty pants. I’m slightly distracted by the tatoo on his neck but I’m totally digging his mullet. He’s going on on about how is car is impounded, again. And of course it’s not his fault.
I let the treadmill run and push all kinds of buttons trying not to make eye contact with him. I’m shocked by how nice it is. I mean it’s really, really freaking nice. Almost as nice as some of the ones at the Y.
Before heading out to look at it I did a bit of research. It was originally listed for $1,800 but you can buy them new for $900 was the lowest price I found. There were some great reviews but also some not so great ones too. Looks like there may have been a few lemons in the lot where there is computer issues but it is fixable. I tell the guy about the issue of the computer and some poor reviews and then sigh and say “Gee whiz, I really don’t need this and my studly, darlin husband would just be so very unhappy. Are you willing to go a bit lower on the price?”

He-Well $800
Me-$800!?!?! You have it listed on Craigslist for $500!!
He-no I don’t think so lil lady. I just want to get my money back out of the dam thing.
Me-pulling out my iPhone to show him the ad.
He-dam it my wife must have listed it wrong. But ok I’ll take $500.
Me-oh….sigh. I was actually thinking $300


What!?! 300!$$ No way!!

He is getting a little cray cray in the eye, is kinda pissed and walks away from me. I’ve got nothing to lose and it’s not my intention to piss him off but I knew I was willing to spend $350 and I had a feeling I could get him there.
He calms down and says $400. I say no I can’t do that. I just can’t. I’ll go 350$ but that’s it. He goes inside to ask his wife and comes out.
I leave it running while we goto the bank because I think that’s the smart thing to do, a little test. Coming back with the money it’s still running. I told my mother in law if he unplugged it or stopped it then no deal. But…he didn’t. I couldn’t believe it.
This thing is a beast!!

We get it in the truck and drive away.
Boo yeah!!!
Ummm now time to get it in the house.


Have you ever bought a used treadmill? Ever feel like you put your life in danger because of it?

2 thoughts on “Steal!

  1. The things we’ll do for running! That is an awesome story! And sounds like you got a great deal. Wonder if they’ve spent all the money at WalMart by now? (going to hell, I am!)

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